This just coming in over the wires...
Trump to name son Eric as running mate
(Rooters, New York) — Presumptive Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump will choose his son, Eric Trump, as his vice presidential running mate, according to two sources close to the Trump campaign.
“To be quite frank, we couldn’t find anyone else who was willing to do it,” said one source close to the New York real estate mogul who wished to remain anonymous. “Look, when Newt (deleted) Gingrich turns you down, you know you’re pretty much (deleted) out of luck, because that guy will do anything for the right amount of money.”
A second source, who also wished to remain anonymous, confirmed Trump’s choice of his son Eric, noting, “Eric is a smart guy and he likes many of the same things his dad does. Mainly, blondes. That said, he’s also a very good businessman, and he has been handling much of his father’s real estate empire for the last five years or so as Donald was busy with his television work and running for president.”
A caller to the Rooters News Network office who identified himself as “John Mueller” and who claimed to be a Trump campaign spokesperson said, “Eric is very, very talented. He is tremendous, really spectacular. A super businessman like his dad and he’s great with the ladies and the Mexicans and the Hispanics and the coloreds, too. And he will be instrumental in helping his father make America great again. Because with Obama and now lying Hillary as a third term of the awful Obama, things are really, really terrible.”
The first source said Trump had interviewed numerous Republicans who are currently holding elected office, but all of them turned down a possible vice presidential bid.
“You’d figure with the naked ambition of most of these folks, one of them would have said yes. But even Corker wouldn’t do it. Donald finally broke down and called Louie Gohmert (TX-1), but after he got off the phone with him, Donald said, ‘No way. He’s Louie Gohmert Pyle,’” the source said.
Trump is said to have considered offering the position to Sarah Palin, but every time he tried to reach out to her, she “sounded like she had knocked back a box of wine,” the source said. “And even Mike Huckabee said no. Mike (deleted) Huckabee. The guy sells snake oil diabetes cures to poor, sick people and he won’t run with Donald.”
The source continued, “We’ve turned over every rock. No dice. Ralph Reed just laughed. The biggest political prostitute of all time. Ralph (deleted) Reed.”
Rooters tried to reach Donald Trump, his campaign and Eric Trump, but calls and emails were not returned.
According to both sources, Donald Trump has yet to set a timetable for announcing his son as his vice presidential candidate.
The first source said, “I would look for an event at one of the Trump properties. Eric loves Trump Tower, Istanbul, but Donald knows the optics wouldn’t be good on that. We’ll probably end up at Trump International Golf Course in West Palm (ed. Beach, Florida). Eric loves that place. And he can get in a round or two before and after the announcement.”
“We’re already calling it Trump Squared,” said the first source. “It’ll make getting the stuff on hats, t-shirts, coffee mugs, wine bottles, meat boxes and other Trump stuff easy and it will keep the money in the family. Donald likes that.”